Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Caught in the middle.

My mood swing terribly yesterday.

One moment i’m happy and all. The next moment i thought i was gonna kill someone or probably kill myself.

I’m caught in the middle. In many situations. Not just 1. I end up not being able to please everyone. And everyone gets angry with me, scold me, scream at me, no matter what decision I make. FML.

I don't owe anyone anything!

I know I may not make the best decision. Or to you guys it’s a stupid decision. But please respect me. Cause it’s still MY decision. And I’m old enough to judge for myself and decide what I want to do.

End of day, I’m the only one responsible for whatever decision I make and I’m the only one who will have to bear the consequences, be it for good or bad.

Why is it that no one tries to understand me and respect me.

I’m feeling like a piece of shit now. Whatever i do seem to be wrong.

Was suppose to go out for dinner last night. Stupid things happened. I was in a terrible mood. No appetite though I was obviously hungry and having a gastric pain. Well, no one cares anyway. They all ONLY care about themselves. So why should I care as well.

End up, I went to bed with an EMPTY stomach, a TERRIBLE mood, a heart full of HURT, and a pair of eyes FILLED with TEARS.

I HATE my life. FML!


RaiN said...

To a certain extend, I do agree with what you said. Yes, we know you are old enough, big enough, mature enough to judge a situation and make a decision

But when decisions made not only affect yourself, you might want to give others abit of time. Time for digestion, reaction and acceptance. Just like you are free to make your decisions, allow others room for theirs too.

Everyone wants to feel appreciated and respected. You do, I do, your friends do.
I guess I can empathize with you, but I think you have to sympathize your friends too. Sometimes you want to be too nice and fear to notify others in time. This could make people in a fix at times

I didn't write above with respect to our recent episode. I had blown my top, and since my top is blown, that episode is over for me. Though due to recent issues, a new form of inertia just appeared to be forming in me.

After your current frustrations and anger, give yourself sometime to think for the person you mentioning :) It might be good for both of you

Yuriko said...

Da Jie, I'll take note of that. Thanks. =)

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